Dropping all current projects to focus on something called ComputerBike

Thinking of building a dedicated Boston Legal machine. For the bedroom

Still confused by that Sheryl Crow song where she can't afford to attend communist meetings

*at the AGM* I came here to look at financial statements and vote. And we're all done looking at the financial statements

Sorting through astonishingly cute cat photos and thinking, no, none of these are quite good enough for the group chat

All the funny references to Biden in 2010-era sitcoms are so chilling now

Re-watched the Prince episode of New Girl and got emotional

State of the Mirth Turtle 2024 powerpoint this Friday, 2pm ADT! Come watch me evaluate my failures and preview next year's projects.

https://twitch.tv/mirthturtle

Not famous at all but I'm sure a bunch of therapists have heard about me at great length

You can always pick out the Go player in the crowd... they're the one talking about hanes

Genocides Joe and Justin high-fiving because a Netanyahu Alert just popped up on the Lies Computer

Charlie's doing numbers over on Reddit

https://www.reddit.com/r/OneOrangeBraincell/comments/1c0leur/puffed_up_for_a_fight_because_the_fridge_made_a/

Careful, eclipse-watchers! The totality is a prime opportunity for pickpockets

I could have never guessed as a kid that my peanut butter and honey habit would be so expensive

Sometimes when opportunity knocks I don't answer the door because they should have texted first

Can't let my hair get to a certain length or else I end up with Cillian Murphy in Red Eye energy

CEO OF PLASTIC CONTAINER COMPANY: our products must be as painful to open as possible EMPLOYEE: are you sure– CEO: yes. this should be true of EVERY plastic container

These days, AI could probably make Diamond Find in a few hours, but back in 2011 I had to do it all myself

https://mirthturtle.com/diamondfind

Eating the most disgusting oatmeal slop for breakfast every day so that when I finally let myself make waffles again I'll have a religious experience